You Have Died of Dysentery - Unisex Hoodie Size:M acknowledging that surviving December requires

acknowledging that surviving December requires the same energy as a Slayer mosh pit

Korben Dallas survived combat missions across the galaxy

wielding a sword and ornate round shield depicting fighting figures

" surrounded by blue and white musical notes

Takashi's only qualifications are a tiny red tricycle and a blood alcohol level that defies medical science

You Have Died of Dysentery - Unisex Hoodie Size:M acknowledging that surviving December requiresOregon Trail taught an entire generation that manifest destiny ends not with a bang but with violent diarrhea, announced in the same calm green font as a math quiz. Every elder millennial's real history education fits on a floppy disk and a tombstone. The Details: Green monochrome pixel art depicts an ox hitched to a covered wagon, rendered in blocky 8 bit style mimicking an Apple II green phosphor display. A bordered rectangle below contains